What stops you dead in your tracks?
One thing that stops me is thinking about my performance. Whether it is before, during, or after an action in which I want to perform and do it well, thinking about my performance paralyzes me.
For what I am really doing in that moment is judging my performance, but more specifically, what I am really, really doing is jumping to (very negative) conclusions about my performance.
I am deciding I know exactly what You think about it.
Except every single time You are actually Me, as my worst version of myself.
Quick, what’s the absolute worst thing you could say about this totally piece-o-shit performance? Ha ha, nice! Burn. And so true!
Is it any wonder I find myself paralyzed?
What’s cool though is now that I see how my reaction looks — how I jump to conclusions and paralyze myself — I can begin shifting my thinking around this behaviour.
In recognizing it, I now have a choice if I want to continue engaging with it, or if I want to respond to my mind, and it’s harsh paralyzing judgements, with an understanding awareness and a willingness to let them pass. I don’t need to hold on to them. They aren’t helping.
I like the power in this, and with practice, I trust I can create the mental freedom I desire. Because in the end, I perform because I need and want to, and nothing, not even my own harsh judgements, are going to stop me from doing what I love.
photo credit: Crashmaster
